Thursday, February 6, 2014

What I NEED You To Understand.....

 I do not will my seizures into being, they happen even when I am asleep.

They hurt me , they make me fall.

I do not want them.

I feel betrayed by my own body.

If  my  subconsciousness  is doing this to me I hope it dies.

If you think I am doing this on purpose put yourself in my place...or at least try,
To loose control of your own body is one of the most frightening things that can happen to a person.

That is what I need you to understand.

4 comments:

  1. I can't imagine anyone thinking you'd bring this on yourself. I wouldn't wish what you go through on anybody. Sending my love!

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  2. Doctors often conclude that symptoms are psychogenic when they can't put their fingers on what's causing them. These have included some very physically ill people whose underlying illness was eventually diagnosed but was dismissed as psychogenic at the time for lack of the right tests.

    I'm sorry they weren't able to work out what was causing your seizures. What kind of doctor have they referred you to for February?

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    Replies
    1. Well either a psychologist or psychiatrist, I have trouble remembering the difference....but anyway he see patients with psychogenic seizures.
      I am hopeful he will me my friend unlike the person I saw in 2010 or 2009.
      That was awful, she told me I was stupid and did not have enough brains to draw flowers ( I had to take an IQ test and did not do that great, nobody stops the timer if you have a seizure you just miss a bunch of it) She also told me I was a nut because my best friend was in her 50s or 60s. Yeah...I was very upset. I was not as strong then, I was much younger.
      I know that God controls everything and I have found peace in that and also hope. I really just have to leave it to God, because thats all I can do I cannot handle this all by myself.

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