Mondays...

I.v. day, and today I got to see Ralphie!!

The day still seemed very long.

Also Sandra Westmoreland is the winner of the Easter Seal of the year contest!!

Thanks to everyone that voted for me, I am just so excited that my artwork will be on one of the stamps 2014!!!

That is all I have to say right now.

Good night folks.

Ralphie and The Lady With The Red Bag

 Ralphie and the lady with the red bag were at i.v. yesterday and it helped me a good deal.

I was extremely upset because my main vein has gotten a good lump of scar tissue and it hurt too much last time.

My other veins never worked that good...too slow the nurses said...but this time was different !!! It worked!!

I don't want to cry in front of Ralphie or the lady with the red bag,
I am glad I didn't have too, sometimes you are just so tired you cry no matter how hard you try to hold it in.

The Doctor appointment was ...o.k. I told him I felt drugged on top of drugged, he said give to two more weeks.

I will try.

And try and try and try and try.

Ralphie Is The Best

 Yesterday was i.v. as is every Monday. But what makes it so much better is the first Monday of every month Ralphie gets an i.v. too, I mean not that he has to get an i.v. ...that is sad, I mean that I love getting to see him.

He wanted to see my sketchbook and I finally remembered to bring it this time.

I gave him a drawing and wrote " To: Ralphie, you are the best!"

We tease each other and laugh and be silly. The i.v. room suddenly is not so boring anymore ..in fact it nearly is a party in there.

Also I am excited because he said he will probably come and see me sometime!

Still Not Good

 Yesterday at I.v. Ralphie was there and the lady with the red bag.
They gave me hugs and get well wishes.
Today I got blood taken... only 3 vials  instead of 18.
I feel exhausted.
The plan is to up the medicine again slowly once I get some vitamin k1 and hopefully I will not bleed again.
Drugs are hard , but without it my consciousness flees.
Someone told me I was damned if I took the drugs and damned if I didn't ...that seems increasingly true.
Well , it is what it is.

Ralphie

Today I went to i.v. and Ralphie was there. It is always fun when he is there. He fell asleep and I wrote his name and a little flower with my etch-a-sketch and when he woke up he told the nurses he did it, but they did not believe him. Ralphie does not seem like one to draw flowers. He he. Ralphie has his invitation to my house I made him hanging on his fridge . He did not get to come but I sure hope he comes someday, he said he would like to.

When we left this morning it was only 40 some degrees outside so I wore pants but 2 hours away where I get i.v. it was in the 70s ! I was sad I was not wearing a skirt. I do not like pants very much. Afterwards we went shopping . When we came home Ethan ( my sisters boyfriend) was there. I took a nap, I ate dinner. I went in my hyberbaric chamber. That's what I did today. I also fixed up my room slightly as it was somewhat messy.

Death and Resurrection, My Hope and Also About My Sadness

 Today, I found out a friend of mine had died. He said he would get better because he wanted to dance at my wedding ...someday. Well when you think about it as Christians we are the church and the church is the bride of Christ, we will probably be dancing at THE wedding . Resurrection...something to long for, something I dream about. I want to loose the leg brace and the helmet, I want to be able to walk properly and not have seizures. I don't know if we even will have to walk then, but I am sure I would not need a brace anymore .
 The thing about all of this is if I had not been sick I would of never met this friend. Everything has a reason...EVERYTHING.

Also today I found out Daddy's truck is done for, and Cleveland Clinic wants lots of money, I thought that it was taken care of.

Today at I.V. I did get to see Ralphie !! He made me smile and made time go faster.

I also felt well enough to go shopping for a bit , almost an hour and got a new dress and a pair of pants since my favorite ones are falling apart. I have had both favorite pairs for five years and one pair cost five dollars and the other three , so I guess that I go my dollars worth.
 Anyway today was hard. I cried before I left for I.V. and I cried when I came home because my Dad was so sad and I had to tell him about the death. And I want to cry now because I keep messing up my typing. Life goes one.....and I MUST trust in God because I could not deal with days like this without Him. That is that.

When Ralphie Was a Kid

 At I.V. today Ralphie told me more about when he was a kid and used to have seizures.
When his family had gatherings he was not allowed to visit or play with the other kids. Ralphie had to set in a room all by himself because nobody wanted to see him have seizures. That is so mean. Good thing his seizures disappeared. Ralphie didn't get to go to school when the other kids did, the school said no. He got to start school when he was seven.

 I have had people get pretty freaked out around me and not want to be around me because they saw a seizure, I have had people think I was demon possessed.

 I am very glad that I have a family that loves me and would not / will not hide me away. Things are how they are and sometimes they are not pretty, but there is a reason for it all. Everyone needs love and friendship .